WEBVTT
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[ding]
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[mooing]
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♪ Oh my lord, take this soul ♪
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♪ Lay me at the bottom of the river ♪
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♪ Devil has come to carry me home ♪
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♪ Lay me at the bottom ♪
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♪ Bottom of the river ♪
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[phone ringing]
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Hello.
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Hey, why don't we start
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with you describing the work you're doing.
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It's been 22 years,
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I've been working on this line of cattle that we've got.
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We've put this science on top
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of what we do that makes it so interesting.
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And we're doing something that nobody else does.
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My responsibility is to look after the land
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but just a shame, I missed out on a lot.
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Being gay in a small country town,
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I guess, comes with its challenges.
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The biggest thing is the difficulty
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of having a partner, meeting a partner.
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My mother passed away about 10, 12 years ago
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and my father's got Alzheimer's
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and is in the local nursing home.
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So I'm the big boy in the house now, which is very sad.
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[dramatic music]
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As sorry, as I felt about myself
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being a single gay, man in the country,
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the sorry was never strong enough to make me change
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and go and do something else.
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So as much as the torment came.
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It's just pros and cons.
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You know, do you want the farm?
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Do you want what you've created to be into something?
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Or are you going to just throw it away
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and go and try to meet somebody in Sydney?
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And I stuck it up, I guess.
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I'll keep you up at night, in my dreams,
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but I mean that in a bad way.
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Welcome to Coota Park.
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I'm fourth generation farmer on this property.
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In Australia the beef industry is responsible
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for about 10% of all our emissions
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as much as the whole transport industry.
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Oh!
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And that's not good.
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Okay, let's try.
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Do you'll get a premium for the work that you've done?
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We have an on-property bull sale each year
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which is in a months time.
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With the bulls that you sell,
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it is known that you're specializing in conversion
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and you've got many more data than other people have.
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Is it paying?
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No.
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No.
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Have you another daughter or son?
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No.
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Never married.
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Whether people know that I'm gay
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and whether that means people won't come
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and buy bulls from me
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or people know we're talking about climate change
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and they won't come and buy bulls from us.
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It sends in the market and the industry
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that you're working and trying to work out,
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is it all right to say it.
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[birds chirping]
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[dramatic music]
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Be interesting to see how the bull sale goes
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in a couple of weeks.
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I feel for him if he doesn't have a good sale.
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He keeps on keeping on.
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There'd be times I'd imagine when he's lonely,
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but I suppose everybody's lonely at some stage.
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If they're on their own all the time.
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If he had a partner, he'd be going a lot better.
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If somebody did find him, it'd be fairly handy
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bloke to be hanging around, I can assure you.
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My main relationship was with a guy who was
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a fashion journalist in Sydney.
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Which was a fashion journalist meets farmer.
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Really, he was the guy who should have been the farmer,
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and I should have been the guy who should been
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the fashion journalist.
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Jamie, the guy that I went out with for five years
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he bought this house in Cowra as an investment.
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And so I moved into that house and lived there.
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And then he used to come
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up on the weekends and that sort of stuff.
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And then eventually he moved to Cowra and we both lived here
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for six months or something until it broke down.
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It wasn't easy for me,
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particularly at that time, just at that time.
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Not that I'm saying it was only difficult for me
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but just at that particular time,
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is the time that mum was diagnosed with cancer
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and we were in the middle of a drought
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and it was a pretty dark, dark time for me.
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But that's all part of the processes of putting things
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in place to enable me to get through it.
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So started lining up psychologists
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and lining up medication
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and all this for things, whatever it took to
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to try and make me better.
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But I certainly had to stop going to Sydney all the time
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and looking for happiness and looking for love.
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I think all his friends back in Sydney
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apparently were having bets on how long he'd last
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in Cowra, but he tried, which was amazing.
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Yeah.
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I used to say I had two jobs.
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One was a farmer and the other one was a husband hunter,
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you know?
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And it was this sort of eternal struggle, I guess
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to get into space where a might meet somebody.
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And then if you didn't the depression that came after.
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The day that I came home and told my parents
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that I was gay at the age of 28
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and my mother just asked all the right questions
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and did everything beautifully
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and properly and intelligently.
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And my dad sort of sat there and didn't say much at all.
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It's hard father and sons working together
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can be really, really hard.
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And that's two people making one decision
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or old bull and young bull and all that sort of stuff.
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He built the house that I now live in.
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He created my whole world I guess.
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[dramatic music]
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He couldn't understand why I needed to leave so much
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and needed to go to Sydney so much.
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And that you marry yourself to the land
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and that's what you do.
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And you can see that he had a wife and children
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living with him.
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And so he had everything he wanted right there.
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But he seemed to stick with me and I stuck with it, I guess.
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There's lots of other people out there
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who have a similar experience.
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I struggled with the prospect of being gay
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for probably 20 odd years.
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It's quite a lonely situation.
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I don't think I could have come out and stayed in Cowra.
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The ability to translate your life from say Cowra to Sydney.
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It's a lot easier for someone like me,
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than it would be for someone like Jon.
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He's a farmer, not too many farms around here.
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I can tell you.
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I think he's very brave.
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To go back to a country town and assume
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that life's going to be wonderful.
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Well you don't.
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It can be very lonely.
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I'm not saying I don't have my periods of loneliness either.
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My last partner
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ended up committing suicide and it was pretty hard.
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I know perhaps it must be heading up towards
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certainly 15, might be more,
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people I've known that have committed suicide.
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I don't think I will.
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[piano music]
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The thing I really hated doing farming
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was sitting on a tractor, going round and round.
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I just wished to stop thinking.
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You're always waiting for another phone call
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from people saying that they coming to the sale
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that they're going to buy a bull or four bulls or ten bulls
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just hoping that, you know, you might get a message
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that thing is going to be all right.
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Good Day Jon, it's Rebecca.
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I just wanted to let you know
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that our bulls going on the track tomorrow
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and yeah we're looking at not replacing anything
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til at least after the summer.
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Anyway, I'll speak to you soon, Bye.
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I'm just, I just want it over and done with really,
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and you just want to know, once you know, where you're at
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it's a whole lot easier to deal with then not knowing.
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So it's a bit, every year at this particular time,
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lambs to the slaughter.
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It's the feeling that I get,
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where you sort of know what's going to happen
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and cause it's a tougher year,
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it's more likely to happen, but that's cool.
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That's cool.
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That's her choice.
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[birds chirping]
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[cows mooing]
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It's gonna be tough, but that's all right.
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We've prepared ourselves for this moment.
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Of it being tough and you never know
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you might get a surprise, but I'm a bit over that now.
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Would you like a chair outside Harv?
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It's very thoughtful.
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[dramatic music]
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How's it all the cows need huh?
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Yeah, I do, but anyway.
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By the time the first bull starts being auctioned,
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I'll know what's gonna happen?
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If we can have your attention, please.
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We'd like to get this all under way here this afternoon,
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Firstly, a very warm welcome.
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In what we experienced something completely different
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than what we saw here last year in weather.
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We all had snow clouds forming
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and we were kicking up the dust.
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Well, I think that anything else.
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Well there we go to ladies and gentlemen,
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no more wasting time straight into the first pen.
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Lot number one.
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Who's gonna bid 9,000, come on give me seven, give me six,
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we've got six to go, who's got five, 5,000 Charlie,
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Come on, who's got 5,000, whose got four, 4,000,
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four to go, four to start, four Charlie, four to go,
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four to start, who's got four to go.
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Ladies and gentlemen, we won't go below that signal five.
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Some of the best bull Jon's got here this year
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and he's pulling them there at the end of 32
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and some of the best bulls he's ever bred here tonight.
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Four to go, four to start, four Charlie.
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Nothing we can do about that.
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Ladies and gentlemen we'll skip that first bull aside.
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Oh, Fuck.
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Here we go lot number two, lot number two this time.
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[dramatic auctioneering]
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That completes the auction here today.
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He's hoping for a little bit of rain going forward
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seems to put a smiles on many people's faces still
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considering how tough it is.
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Thank you and have a good day.
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[clapping]
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[chattering]
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Thank you.
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I always compare myself to the best and want to be the best.
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So that's the hard part I guess,
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a little bit is going, trying to work out
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what you're doing wrong and change it
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and then trying to be more successful.
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So yeah, once you get into that space, it gets quite complex
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because then you realize the only way that you're going to
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make that amount of money is actually change your breed.
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If I'd started with straight Angus and didn't have
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done what we've done over the last 22 years
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I'd imagine we probably could be doing very, very, very
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very, very well, but that was my choice.
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So I chose to, to cross two breeds together
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and give it a name and go along the line
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of composite breeding, so it's no one else's responsibility
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but mine.
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We can always hyphenate and do something better.
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[crickets chirping]
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The more battles you create in your life,
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the less time their is to hear the silence
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and the emptiness.
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Well latest were reviewed to the UN climate summit
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by teenage activist Greta Thunberg,
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who called for immediate action on climate change.
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My message is that we'll be watching you.
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[dramatic music]
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The issue of climate change is quite challenging
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in agriculture.
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There's a lot of people who believe it's not happening.
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This is science.
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This is not me making anything up.
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It might be that part about being gay and being a gay farmer
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or something like that.
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And the part about coming out was just that realization,
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that I can't lie anymore.
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I can't bullshit anymore.
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You got to,
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you have to be real.
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You have to be honest.
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And that cements something pretty powerful.
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The only people who aren't talking about it is our industry.
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[dramatic music]
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We're trying to do the best thing
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by the land that we have and the space that we occupy
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for the period of time that we do.
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That's the part that I want to live on after I'm gone.
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♪Oh my lord, take this soul, ♪
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♪ lay me at the bottom of the river ♪
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It is not fun, it is challenging
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We do something very unique.
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♪Lay me at the bottom ♪
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Why would I walk away from that?
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♪ Bottom of the river ♪
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I always looked at my point of differences
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something I was never going to let that stand
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in the way of what I achieved in my life.
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[dramatic music]
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For days, Jon is an original thought,
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that what we've got to originality and it's look now
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here we are.
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And we haven't had to tear ourselves up and go.
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We dream about might be a better place to be,
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and start from scratch there again.
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We're still here in the same place.
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Making the best we can of it.
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I love my dad.
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Of course I do, I absolutely do.
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No one made me come back to the farm.
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In fact, my parents pushed me away.
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My father sat me down and said, here's the rule.
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You're not coming back to this farm til your 25.
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And I thank him so much.
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Thank him for yeah,
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because it puts the responsibility back on me.
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[engine revving]
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[dramatic music]
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Where are my dreams at now?
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What can I create that when I go has justified
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the air that I breathe and the space that I took up
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in being a human being on this Earth.
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It's just a reality, everybody's trying to create
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low emission products.
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The beef industry has to try and do it well.
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From when I could walk I was chasing the cows around
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on the farm, so my love for that
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was a glue or a constant or something?
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I look back on that boy or young man
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going around on a tractor with such anxiety
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and such unhappiness and then say,
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well, I'm not him anymore.
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Isn't that just unreal?
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Are you all right?
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That's a bit better.
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[phone ringing]
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Hello, Chris speaking.
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Chris, it's Jon Wright speaking with Harvey.
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Yeah wait just a second man.
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Thanks.
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Thank you.
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It's Harvey's son.
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Just a bit.
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Jonathan you're the cattle man.
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I'm the cattle man, that's right.
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I can't rewrite history.
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I can't rewrite my life.
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What I do know is the result of what's happened in the past
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is where I am now.
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And I'm really happy and really content in that.
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And do I want it to be better?
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Do I wish for some things that, aren't here now, maybe.
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All I can do is just keep being driven
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and keep being positive.
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I reckon they'll come
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I reckon they'll come.
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[dramatic music]